House of Anubis: The Pleasure of Pain
by RjHe30
Summary: Something happens over the summer holiday, and Patricia thinks there is one way, and only this one way to "heal" herself. What happened? How is she comforting herself? Peddie!
1. Chapter 1: How It All Happened

**_(A/N: Chappy by 'Rjvamp 369'. Hope you enjoy! R&R!)_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's P.O.V_**

I slowly walked into the kitchen, prepared for a conversation I would surely lose.

"Mum?" I whispered. She turned quickly placing her bony fingers on her hips.

"What is it?" she asked, fluttering her eyes. I twiddle my thumbs.

"Can I… Can I go see Em?" I mumbled, using the sweetest voice I could. Em was my cousin. She worked in a shop down town and I barely ever got to go see her and considering tonight was family night, I didn't think that would change. My mum sighed.

"Well I know you haven't seen her in a while, so..." she cut her sentence short to toss me the car keys. I stare at her in shock.

"Thanks mum!" I cried, running out of the kitchen into the driveway. I unlocked the car and climbed in.

I pulled up outside Em's shop. I quickly slammed the car door shut and ran inside. I saw her standing aimlessly behind the counter. My face lit up.

"Em?!" I cried. She looked up and grinned.

"Patricia!" She screeched and ran over to me, strangling me in a hug.

"I missed you," she said. I laughed and pulled out of her embrace.

"I missed you too," I replied smiling.

"What are you doing here? Where's Piper?" she asked. I shrugged.

"I came here to see you! As for Piper… I think she's out with friends," I say quickly. She nodded.

"Well, it's your lucky day Trish - you get to help me behind the counter!" she giggled, practically shoving me in front of a cash machine.

We spent the rest of the day laughing and talking and anything we could think of. I then began to look round the shop, only to see a newspaper with a man's face on it. The headline read '**_Escaped Murderer'_**. My attention towards the paper was suddenly broken by the sound of rustling. I turned to see a hooded boy around 16 shoving cigarettes into his pockets

"Hey!" I yelled. The boy looked shocked and began to run out of the store.

"Patricia, get him!" Em shouted.

"What about you?" I cried a little annoyed.

"I'm in heels" she mumbled pointing towards her stilettos. I groaned and began to run after the boy.

I chased him down the street and through an alleyway until eventually he stopped at a car park. I had him cornered.

"You didn't pay for those, dick" I hissed. The boy gave me a sorrowful look and then I felt a large hand cover my face. I screamed and tried to kick my attacker but they were too strong. I was then chucked into a car.

"Let me out!" I screamed. Suddenly a man and a woman got in next to me and pulled me up by my hair.

"Just relax," the woman said, taking out a knife and dragging it down my face. I let out a silent yelp. Then another man got in the driver's seat and began to drive. I felt my heart rate increase.

"Where are you taking me?" I softly cried.

The man in the driver's seat smirked. "What's your name, sweetheart?" he said, avoiding my question.

"P-Patricia" I stuttered, afraid of what would happen if I didn't answer. The man let out a light chuckle and focused himself back on the road. I could feel myself shaking as the women continued to trace the knife up and down my body. I turned my head slightly to peer out the window. We seemed to have taken a turn into the woods.

"Do I take a left or a right here?" the driver asked hastily.

"A left," the man next to me stated, adjusting his seat position. My mind was racing with the possibilities of what my fate could hold. Was this all a dream? Maybe Em will call the police? But how will she know where I am? I need to do something... Now! I was then taken over by adrenalin and slapped the woman next to me, as she screamed in pain. I leant over her and tried to open the door.

"What the hell is going on back there?!" The driver yelled. Next thing I know, I was yanked back away from the door.

"Noooo!" I screeched. The car then began to lose control and the next thing I knew, we had crashed. I quickly looked around me - everyone seemed to have passed out, so I slowly clambered out of the car door and onto the cold forest ground. My heart sank when I heard footsteps. I looked up to see the driver and then I recognised him. It was the man on the front of the newspaper… The escaped murderer!

"You bitch!" He hissed, kicking me hard in the stomach. I let out a yelp and curled up in a ball. "Where is she?!" Another voice yelled. It was the woman's.

"Calm down Julie, just go get Alex," the man said.

"I can't! He's dead!...THAT BITCH KILLED HIM!" She screamed. I then felt a sharp pain in my shoulder. I turn to look and saw blood pouring out - she had stabbed me!

I screamed "P-p-please j-j-just l-let me g-go!" I stuttered. Then the man kneelt down next to me.

"Why would we do that when this is so much more fun?" He whispered eerily. I felt tears streaming down my face. I was scared... and they knew it. The man then grabbed me by my wrists and pinned me down. I screamed even though I knew no one would hear. I then felt his hands move under my shirt. I couldn't bear what was happening. It felt so much like a nightmare.

"P-p-please stop," I moaned. But he wouldn't... It just got worse.

When the man had finished with me I crawled slowly away but I was getting nowhere. I could hear the ungodly sound of laughter coming from the man and woman. I then reached my hand towards a hard rock and grabbed it.

"Screw you," I mumbled.

"Sorry, what was that sweetheart?" The man asked.

"Yeah we can't understand you, honey," the women added. I began to stand up - it took all my strength but I started to stand, with the rock lying heavily in my hand.

"I said screw you!" I screamed and through the rock straight at the man's face and ran... Ran for my life. I didn't dare stop to check if they were behind me. I just focused on the endless path ahead. "Stop!" I heard them yell from behind. I could feel my legs growing weaker but I still kept going. I finally came to a road and saw a car coming down. I started waving my hands frantically in the air. "Hey! Stop! Please!" I screamed. The car began to slow down.


	2. Chapter 2: Secrets

**_(A/N: Chappy by He0524! Hope you enjoy! R&R!)_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's POV_**

**_A few weeks later_**

_I was screaming for mercy, yet the man wouldn't stop. _

_"P-p-please j-j-just l-let me g-go!" I stuttered. Then the man kneelt down next to me._

_"Why would we do that when this is so much more fun?" He whispered eerily. I felt tears streaming down my face. I was scared... and they knew it. The man then grabbed me by my wrists and pinned me down._

"Ahhh!" I woke with a start.

"Patricia? Are you okay?" I hear Joy come up to my bed. Yea, summer was over and I was back at Anubis.

"Yea Joy, I'm fine," I say, and walk off to the bathroom.

I get out my blade that I hide under the bathroom carpet. I sit on the floor and slowly bring it up to my arm. I steady it, and press down, dragging it across my wrist.

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Drip_

That's my blood falling on the tiles of the floor. But no. It's not enough. Once again, I steady it onto my wrist, and pull it across, much, much deeper than before. By now, you can't tell that it's someone's wrist. But I feel so much better. See, ever since_ that_ took place, the only way I felt worth living was by self-harm. Without it, I felt useless – like a piece of rubbish that was left behind to rot. I've told no-one. That day, has been planted into my brain – its roots, so deep that I can never pull it out. It has scarred me for life. Not that anyone knows… That day, when I got home, I tried to end it. To end it all, and just be emotionless. But I was too scared to – I realised it was the pain that I wanted to end, not my life. I hear a soft knock at the door.

"Patricia?" Joy's voice calls out.

"What?" I snap.

"What are you doing? I need the bathroom," she said, with a hint of desperation in her voice.

"I'm…" I started. I had to think of a lie, and fast.

"I'm… Taking a shower?" It came out more as a question than an answer.

"What? At 3:30 in the morning?" she half whispered half shouted it.

"Uh, yea. I guess I sweated lot today, unpacking and everything… And I smelt bad, so surprise! I'm taking a shower!" I said. _Please buy it, please buy it… _My head was pounding.

"Um… Okay, then… But make it quick please!" she said, and I heard her footsteps leave.

Damn, that was close… I'd better clean up this mess and have a quick shower…

**_At the breakfast table the next morning_**

All of us were running quite late. Trudy was trying to get us to eat faster, so we wouldn't be late for class.

_"P-p-please j-j-just l-let me g-go!" I stuttered. Then the man kneelt down next to me._

_"Why would we do that when this is so much more fun?" He whispered eerily. I felt tears streaming down my face. I was scared... and they knew it. The man then grabbed me by my wrists and pinned me down._

It just kept on replaying in my head. I tried to shake myself out of it. I looked up from my plate and saw Eddie. He smiled at me. My eyes widen and I run out of the house, grabbing my things on the way.

His smile looked WAY too familiar…

**_Eddie's POV_**

I smile at Yacker. I've missed her so much… Next chance we get alone together… Eddie, snap out of it! I scream at myself and chuckle lightly. Suddenly, Patricia's out the door. I groan. What could I have possibly done wrong this time? We were barely alone… I decided that I'd have to catch up with her right now.

"See you guys in class," I say, before running out too.

**_Patricia's POV_**

An arm grabs me from behind. I scream.

"Yacker?" It was Eddie. Damn, now he's gonna know something was up, and I didn't, no, couldn't bear to tell him.

"Hi," I smile my fake smile, kissing his cheek.

"What was that?" he asked me.

"A kiss on the cheek…" I say, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No, Patricia, why did you scream like that when I grabbed your arm? And yea, you've never kissed my cheek like that before… What's up?" he asks, suspiciously. I groan.

"Nothing's wrong, Eddie. Nothing…" I say. "So how was holiday?" I ask, trying to change the subject. Luckily, my boyfriend is a doofus, so he answered my question.

"Oh it was great thanks," he smiled. "How was yours?" he asked, grinning. "Miss me?" he asks.

"Of course!" I say, sarcastically. "Who wouldn't miss this adorable face?" I say, more sarcastically than before. He gives me a weird look, but the bell goes.

Saved by the bell, as they say…


	3. Chapter 3: Talking and Suspisions

**_(A/N: Chappy by Rjvamp 369 and a little message: Hey guys, thx for all your reviews! Please keep them coming - they mean a lot! Luv u!)_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's P.O.V_**

I continued to fast walk to my first class when there was an announcement on the speaker.

"Could Patricia Williamson report to my office immediately," I could instantly tell the voice was none other than Mr Sweet. I let out a groan, for I knew what this would be about. I changed directions and headed to his office. I pushed on the dusty, wooden door and listened to the creak as it flung open. "Oh, um, Patricia… sit down," he said,as if he was unsure. I nodded and took the seat opposite his desk.

"How are you? I haven't seen you since... well…" he trailed off. Mr Sweet knew everything about what happened - he was the one who saved me. If he hadn't been driving down that road, I don't know what would have happened… But I made him swear not to tell anyone, especially Eddie. I couldn't let this get out.

"I'm fine...I guess…" I mumbled. I could feel tears forming. Why am I crying? What is happening to me? I'm strong, or so I thought I was.

"It's ok to cry you know," he said soothingly. I shook my head and sniffed.

"No it's not. It makes me weak," I murmured.

"You wanna know what I think?" He whispered. I nodded, lifting my head to face him.

"I think you found a way to get out of bed this morning... and that makes you the strongest person I know," he said, comforting me. Even though I was crying and despite everything, I somehow formed a smile.

"Thank-you," I breathed. Mr Sweet nodded.

"You may go to your class, unless you'd prefer to spend the rest of the day at Anubis House?" He asked. I shook my head, knowing that would seem suspicious.

"No, I'll be ok," I said, wiping my tears on my sleeve. Mr Sweet nodded and signalled me out.

**_Eddie's P.O.V_**

I stared out the window in a daydream. I couldn't concentrate on the teacher. I had stuff on my mind. What did my dad want with Patricia? Why is she acting so weird? The questions circled my head continuously, begging for answers that may never be given.

"Eddie?" A voice said. I turned to see Fabian looking at me as if I was crazy.

"What?" I snapped, rather harshly, which I instantly regretted.

"I uh… You just looked worried s-so um n-n-nothing," Fabian stuttered, then he turned away to focus on the class. I let out a sigh and continued to wonder into my thoughts. I need to know what's going on with Patricia and I'm gonna find out one way or another. Suddenly, the classroom door opened to reveal Patricia who went to go sit down next to Joy. She then turned and we exchanged glances. "What did he want?" I mouthed. Patricia just shook her head and turned away from me.

_What was going on?_


	4. Chapter 4: The Kiss

**_(A/N: Chappy by He0524… From the both of us: A big THANK-YOU TO ALL our reviewers, followers and people who clicked the 'favourite' button! You guys mean the world to us! On with the chappy... PS: I do NOT mean to offend any French people! REMEMBER it is Patricia's POV, not mine! :p. Also, sorry if it seems like there's too much repetition, but that's the point!)_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's POV_**

I sigh to myself. Why was life so hard? Eddie's getting beyond suspicious, and I feel bad about keeping this from him, but I can't let it slip out no matter what. I was trying to study for my French test, but I wasn't concentrating. I read it:-

1) 'Bonjour, commas ava?' is used as a what?

This crap that I had to learn when I already had so many things on my mind… Just then, I hear Eddie come into my room.

"Whaaaaaaat?" I groan.

"Jeez, can't a boyfriend come into his girlfriend's room?" he questioned.

"I'm busy… Stupid French test…" I mumbled.

"Le'mme help you… You know I'm fluent in French…" he says, smirking. NO way I was gonna accept HELP from Weasel face…

"No," I began. "No help needed," I said, grinning. He frowned.

"Now go out," I said. He pulls a puppy-dog face.

"Please?" he asked, with his ever-so-strong American accent.

"Oh fine," I said. "But no disturbing me," I finished, looking back down at my book.

For the first 4 minutes, we kept on exchanging flirty glances, and smiling. But as we entered the 5th minute, Eddie said, "Oh gosh, I can't take it any longer," he said softly, suddenly kissing me.

"Yup. You. Are. Not. Disturbing. Me. At. All," I said sarcastically, in between the kisses. Eddie laughs softly. Finally, after a good 10 minutes of making out, he slips his hand under my shirt.

**_The man then grabbed me by my wrists and pinned me down. I screamed even though I knew no one would hear. I then felt his hands move under my shirt._**

It played in my head. I let out a scream and pushed _him _away. I realized what had happened. I just pushed EDDIE away! Great, add another clue to his already BIG pile. I decide to pretend nothing happened.

"Yacker?" Eddie asked, looking at me in such a way, that I just had to tell him.

"During the summer," I began. Then I realized that I couldn't tell him. He looks at me strangely.

"Yes? During the summer…" his face dares me to go on.

"During the summer," I said, walking up to him and playing with his buttons on his blazer.

"I missed you so much," I whispered into his ear, and began kissing him softly. It fooled him and the kiss turned rough. I pushed all the terrifying images out of my head and focused of Eddie.

_That, was, close._

**_Eddie's POV_**

The second time I slipped my hand under her shirt, I felt her tense up, so I quickly removed it. I was back in the room that Fabian and I share, and was just thinking about how Yacker has been acting since we got back from semester break. Screaming when I grabbed her arm back at school? Pushing me away, with an almost terrified look on her face when I slipped my hand under her shirt? My dad and her, talking and her not telling me what he wanted? It somehow didn't add up. But I knew something was going on.

_What truly happened over the summer?_

**_Patricia's POV_**

After Eddie went back to his room, I ran towards the bathroom, crying. I got my 'comforter' underneath the carpet and rolled up my blazer sleeve.

**_Stupid. How could you nearly let your boyfriend find out? Stupid, stupid, stupid! _**

"I know, I'm sorry," I mumbled to myself. Wow, was I now going insane, talking to myself?

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Drip_

This was the deepest time that I had ever cut. Shit, I was feeling dizzy. Then,_ BLACK._

I woke up, still in my uniform, on the bathroom floor. I try to stand up, but my legs gave away. Damn. I hold onto the basin and manage to stand up. I look at myself in the mirror. Blood. Blood everywhere. My hair, already being red, was soaked in blood. I decided that I had to clean up. No choice. I took a quick shower, then began to clean up the floor, where my blood had made swimming pool.

"Damn," I swear at myself, for my stupidity – I should have cleaned the floor before taking the shower. I sigh as I finish cleaning the mess and get in the shower again, just for a quick rinse.

"Ow," I mumble, wincing at the pain coming from my left wrist. I pulled it up to my face for a closer view. Wow… I had cut really deep. And maybe, even the blade was infected or dirty. I rinse my wrist with cold water. I get out the bandage and wrap it in around my wrist. Now, if someone asks, I can just say that it was a twisted wrist or something… I smile to myself as I put on some black tights and a long-sleeved purple tight top. Even if I had an excuse, Eddie (being the doofus he was) would sense that I was lying. I would only use it if ABSOLUTLY necessary – better safe than sorry…

"Patricia?" a voice calls.

"Yea, Trudy?" I answer.

"Dinner's ready!" she calls.

"Coming right down!" I reply, before quickly clipping back my still-wet-hair and running downstairs.

_It's actually a miracle that no-one tried to come into the bathroom while I was in there. I was out for at least 3 hours… _

**_At dinner_**

"Trixie, why you so pale?" Jerome asked. My heart skips a beat inside. I have to think of something fast…

"Because I'm so hungry, what do you think, Brainless?" I question.

"Nothing…" Jerome says, eyeing me.

_GREAT. Another person._


	5. Chapter 5: The Letter

**_(A/N: Hello guys! Sorry for not updating in a while, but we're teenage girls – we're busy bees! LOL! Chappy by Rjvamp 369 and a message: 'Thanks for all your reviews and keep them coming!'_**

**_R&R! Love u guyz xxx)_**

**_Mr Sweets P.O.V_**

I stared down at my desk scanning my eyes through recent notes. I let out a sigh and laid back in my chair, for today had been stressful. I then turned my head a few degrees to see a pile of letters labeled 'Anubis House'. It was the Anubis mail that I was supposed to give to Trudy earlier, since all mail comes directly to me. I groaned and grabbed the pile. Then, I saw the letter on top was addressed to 'Patricia Williamson'. I stared at it. It couldn't hurt to look, right? After everything she's been through, I call it... taking precautions. I took the letter and carefully opened the seal, trying to avoid ripping the paper. It read:

**_Dearest Patricia,_**

**_I AM COMING FOR YOU_**

**_Love_**

**_You-Know-Who_**

I stared down at the paper in disbelief. I didn't know what to do. I can't give Patricia this. I need to help her but, I don't know how! I kept rereading the letter thinking that it would all go away but it didn't. I slammed my fist on the desk trying to release my anger and confusion but it did no good. There was no way in hell I was gonna sentence Patricia to a life of paranoia because of this letter. I gently folded it up and placed it by my desk light.

**_Patricia's P.O.V_**

It's almost lunchtime! Finally! I swear the whole school days been a blur… Eddie keeps bugging me all the time, asking if I'm ok and I give him the same answer all the time which is the classic "I'm fine". I really just wish the day would end. All I want to do, is curl up in my bed and sleep. But I can't. I decided to go find Mr Sweet so I could talk to him. Right now he's the only one I feel comfortable with which is really strange, actually. I marched up to his office door and knocked three times before entering. But I was greeted with a lifeless office. I sighed, knowing he was probably doing head-teachery stuff, so I just sat down on the chair opposite his desk and waited. Suddenly my eyes caught a suspicious piece of paper which seemed to have been folded up to avoid peeping eyes. But I didn't care. I grabbed the paper and unfolded it. I read the short note and instantly my mouth dropped in horror. No...No...NO! This can't be happening! I thought it was over! How did they get this address!? Suddenly, I heard the door creak open. I turned to see Mr Sweet staring at the note in my hands.

"Patricia, I..." he started. But I didn't stand around to hear it. I just pushed past him and ran as fast as I could. How could he keep this from me!? I trusted him!

_Life is tough…_

**_(A/N: Review plz! We will update when we have 15 reviews! :D Luv u guys all!)_**


	6. Chapter 6: Trusting No-one

**_(A/N: So… Thx for the reviews guys! Chappy by He0524… We appreciate you guys taking your time to read our story (: Luv u so much!)_**

**_Patricia's POV_**

I pushed past him and ran, as fast as my legs could carry me. I didn't even know where I was going, but I later realized that I was in front of a pharmacy. Gee, what was I gonna do in there? My brain was asking my body, instead of the other way around. My legs walked me over to the section. Then, my brain realized that I needed one. I was at the 'needles' section. I looked around if I could find a blade of any sort… Nope… Darn… My legs then carry me out of the pharmacy, and into the stationery shop… Why? I don't know… I stop in front of a pencil sharpener… Oh! The realization hits me – I can use the inner blade… I quickly purchase it and walk across to a restaurant. I make my way to the bathroom there.

I lock the door and lean against it, breathing deeply. I'm about to do this again. I know I'm supposed to have learnt my lesson after the whole 'cut-too-deep' scenario thing, but no. I keep craving it. It's like my best friend. I realized that I had stopped crying a long time ago – so much for tears… I decided to make myself crave it even more. I tease myself with the 'shorter-than-usual' blade. I trace old scars up and down my arm, quite hard, but making sure it doesn't bleed. Finally, when I can't take it any longer, I press down on it, and slowly pull it across my wrist.

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Drip_

Great, I needed this so badly. I always express my feelings on my body, so this time, I wrote 'betrayal' on my arm.

'Betrayal' said my wrist. It was the freshest one, on top of all the others. You could faintly make out some of the other words.

'Hurt'

'Alone'

'Why?'

'Lies'

'Trust?'

Those were some of the recent ones, but there were hundreds. Maybe even thousands. I hear other people come in, so I stuff the still-wet-with-blood blade in my handbag/schoolbag, quickly clean up a little bit, flushed the toilet (it would look suspicious otherwise) and walked out.

I stare at the person waiting to go into a toilet, since all the others were full. My mouth drops open.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"Mom?" I say, surprised.

"Oh hi Patricia," she says, before walking into the toilet. However, a split second later, she turns around.

"Wait, Patricia?" she says, in her infamous accusing tone. Uh oh… I, being the queen of lies, had to think fast. But lying to your mum was different.

"Yea?" I say, as innocently as possible.

"What are you doing here, out of school?" she demands, almost in a low growl.

"I-uh-um…" then it clicks. "We had an enormous gas leak at school, so they let everyone leave early," I said, emphasizing the 'enormous' a little too much, which I immediately regretted.

"But how come you're here, and not in Anbis House or whatever?" she says, her tone convincing me that she knew something was up.

"It's Anubis, mum. Not Anbis," I began, correcting her. I said it as slowly as possible to buy myself time. Lucky for me, my brain was on 'super-mode' and a reason came to me.

"Well, Eddie wanted to celebrate being out of school early, so he brought me on a date here?" Darn, it came out more as a question than an answer. Mum, however, looked desperate to go into that toilet, and so she bought it.

"Well okay then have fun, bye," she said, quickly hugging me before walking into the toilet.

That was close… Just then, I hear my mum mumble.

"Women can be so gross sometimes… How can they leave blood on the floor like this?" then she cursed. I silently chuckled to myself, but I soon realized that I had left MY blood behind after cutting.

_Oops…_

**_Mr Sweet's POV_**

I shouldn't have let Patricia go like that. Ug, poor girl. I had tried to call her for the millionth time after checking with Trudy that she hadn't gone back to Anubis House. Once again, it went straight through to her mail box. I had to have left her at least 10 messages. Her voice recording played for the billionth time.

"If I don't answer, it probably means that I either don't want to talk to you, or I can't talk to you. If you know it's the first option, back off and stop trying to grab the moon. If it's the second… try call me again later. Stop disturbing me, and BYE,"

Why Edison would want to call her his, I have NO idea. But then again, they're only open with each other, and judging by the fact that Patricia didn't want me to tell him, scared me. I realize I'm late for class.

_I've got to reach her_

**_Eddie's POV_**

It was after lunch, and we were in Biology. It was being taught by none other, than my dad. I wasn't bothering to listen.

"Ms Williamson has gone to her mother for private reasons, for the next few hours," he said.

I jolted up.

"Why?" I shout out.

"Mr Miller, please put your hand up when you want to speak. And as I have just said, it was for PRIVATE reasons," he says. But I don't believe him. Gosh, he really needs to practice his lying… I quickly get my phone out and text her.

(**BOLD AND UNDERLINE = Patricia. **_Italics = Eddie_)

_3:10pm_

_Yacker, where r u? _

**3:20pm**

**With my mom. Didn't your dad announce it?**

_3:21pm_

_Oh… He did, but it looked like he wasn't telling the truth…_

**3:21pm**

**Haha y would u think that? Anyway, I gtg, ttyl at Anubis**

3:22pm

Just… He just wouldn't keep eye contact… Anyway, love u, c u l8r

.

"Mr Miller, is that a cell phone?" my dad asks. I groan.

"Yup… Unless you'd like to call it something else…" I trailed off.

"Cockiness will NOT be tolerated in my class!" he says sternly. I get up and storm out of the class. Boy, I was angry.

_Why did Patricia tell my dad first and not me about going to her mom?_

_**(A/N: To the reviewers who asked why Eddie's smile in a previous chapter reminded Patricia of her rapist so much: Stay with us to find out!*Lol*)**_


	7. Chapter 7: Oh My Gosh

**_(A/N: A chapter written by Rjvamp369, hope u guys like it! Please REVEIW!)_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's P.O.V_**

I stared it the floor whilst my head begun to fill with lies of what I could tell Eddie and the others. I arrived back at Anubis a few minutes ago, so they should be here any second... and I'm dreading it. I just wish I had time – time to think about everything, and the big crappy mess my life has become. I just wish I could run away. I almost did, when I saw that letter. It was all I could think about. But I can't – the pain won't just go away as much as I wish it could.

"Patricia?" a voice said. I turned to see a suspicious looking Eddie glaring at me.

"Oh h-hey. I-I-I d-didn't here y-you come in," I stuttered. Damn, why am I stuttering – as if he wasn't suspicious enough!

"Um yeah I came in just now. Are you ok? Why where you with your mum?" he asked curiously. I guess it's lying time.

"Um...Piper! Yeah, she...er...has this concert thingy so my mum was seeing if I wanted...um to go," I said... Gosh, that was an effort. Eddie stared at me as if I was ill.

"And are you?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Oh, no... not really my scene... I guess," I answered. Eddie nodded and sent me a worried look. "Patricia are you sure you're ok?" he said soothingly. I nodded hesitantly.

"Yeah...Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I replied. Eddie bit his lip.

"No reason," he then gave me a smile and pulled me into a hug. I awkwardly hugged him back and sighed. Eddie then leaned back to face me and kissed me softly. It was warm and slow but gave me tingles. He then placed his hands around the bottom of my shirt, but I couldn't do it – not this soon. I could tell where this was going, so pulled away quickly.

"What is it?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Nothing… It's just, don't you wanna do something else... like watch a movie?" I asked. Then he flashed that familiar smirk,

"Why would we do that, when this is so much more fun?" he whispered. I froze. I don't know what happened... it just happened. It was just what he said...I slapped him right across the face – hard. Really hard. I instantly regretted what I had done and covered my mouth

"Oh my gosh Eddie! I'm so sorry!" I yelped. Eddie rubbed his cheek.

"Yacker? What the hell?!" he moaned. I could tell it hurt and not just physically, but emotionally to. He then brushed his hair with his hand and looked at me.

"Ok Patricia. You better tell me what's going on right now!" he yelled. I stared at him and shook my head. I realized I was crying. I can't take it – I've gotta get out of here.

"Eddie...I can't...I'm...I'm sorry" I cried. Then I pushed past him and ran up to my room, slamming the door behind me. Oh. My. Gosh.


	8. Chapter 8: Trouble!

**_(A/N: Chapter by He0524. Thank-you to everyone! Keep the reviews coming, guys! PS: Don't tell us to update faster. We go to school and have a life too. You tell us to update faster, we'll delay. Sorry if I sounded bitchy, but I CANNOT stand people telling me what to do… Thx!)_**

**_WARNING: LANGUAGE_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's POV_**

I was panting. We had just finished running a 1.4km warm up, since it was PE. I'm not fit, and all the hair bands that I wear on my arm were cutting off my blood supply. Why do I wear them, you ask? Well how the hell else am I going to cover up my scars? … But no – I have to take them off right now, or I think I'll pass out…

"Sir, may I please go to the bathroom?" I asked, batting my eyes. He laughed.

"Sure Patricia, but if you're more than 10 minutes, you'll be running an extra 5 laps," he said, looking serious.

"Thanks sir!" I said, and ran to the bathroom, but before that, I went to my locker. I got my PE jumper out. I made my way to the bathroom and took off all 38 hair bands… Damn, that's a lot… I quickly put the jumper on, and stuff the hair bands into my pockets before heading out.

I arrive back at the top-field. I groan out loud – everyone was playing volleyball – my WORST nightmare.

"Alright, Trish, you'll be joining Sarah's team," he said. I groan… again… Sarah, a blondie at the school, was my rival. We were always getting in rows and stuff. Sir shoots me a look and I quickly join the girls.

**_[Few minutes later]_**

The ball comes towards me. I know I HAVE to get this, or my team would lose. I mumble a swear word, try jump… and…

I miss. Yes, I miss the bloody ball – by a smelly inch! I lay on the ground, sulking.

"What the fu**, Goth?" screams Sarah. Uh-oh, here we go again…

"I missed the ball, blondie," I spit out.

"It was such an easy hit! How could you have bloody missed that?" she screams again. Gosh, the whole world could go deaf like that… I get up, to be height to height with my rival.

"Piss off, blondie. It was a fuc*en accident," I shot back, pissed off.

"Why won't you take your ridiculous, hideous, jumper off?" she demands – obviously run out of nasty come-backs.

"Because I don't have to – and besides, I like to keep it on," I say. But no – I was lying. I was beginning to feel like I was going to pass out from the over-heat. "Now if you don't mind, I need to get to class," I say, before turning back.

**_/_**

I get to the bathrooms and take my jumper off. Gosh, I was half-dead. After PE, we have 15 minutes 'grace time'. This is when we are allowed to take a quick shower (optional), change back into our school uniforms (compulsory) and 'cool off'. Since we don't have PE the same time as the boys, they were in History. Then when the bell goes, in approximately 10 minutes, we go to History whilst the boys do PE. I find that stupid, but when we have swimming, it feels right. I take a quick rinse in the cold water, dry off, and change into my school uniform. We wear long sleeved shirts, so I don't have to worry about anything.

**_Anubis House_**

**_Eddie's POV_**

I sigh. We were back at the House from school, and I was wondering why Patricia had been acting so strangely lately. I was in her room, looking for 'clues'. No – not Sibuna clues – Patricia clues. She's downstairs, harassing poor Alfie. I hear her phone ring, so I get up from her bed and make my way to her bag, which was hooked on her chair. It keeps ringing, but I can't seem to find it. Ah, at last – I pull it out, but it stops ringing. Ag, it always happens. But, with the phone, comes out something else. Something wrapped in tissue paper. I wonder what it is, so I carefully open it. Horror strikes me.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Blood, blade. Dried blood stuck to the blade. A horrific image comes into my head, but I quickly push it away.

"Eddie, maybe she was… I dunno, skinning a squirrel or something…" my brain says to me. Yea, right. Skinning a squirrel with the blade of a pencil sharpener? I must be going insane. She can't be… you know… self-harming, can she? I decide to push this out of my head.

"Eddie?" I hear a voice behind me. I jump 5 meters into the air in fright. I turn around.

"Oh h-hey," I manage to say.

"What are you doing in my room?" Patricia asks. I walk up to her, blade behind me.

"I need you to tell me honestly," I say, tears threatening to pour down.

"Okay… What's this about?" she asks.

"Well… I… Um… Okay, your phone rang while you were downstairs, so I looked in your bag to find it," I say. "But, I found…" I show it to her. She lets out a small gasp.

"Oh my gosh," she says, barely audible. She turns around to leave, but I wrap my arms around her shoulders. Surprisingly, she doesn't protest.

I slowly pull up her baggy-black-long -sleeved top she was wearing.

Cuts. Cuts everywhere. Some, crisscrossed, some legible words, and so much more. I felt something wet drop on my arm. She was crying. Indeed crying – she had a stream running down her face, and she was muttering something.

"Why?" I softly asked into her ear.

"…" was her reply.

"Why did you?" I asked again.

"…"

"Babe, please," I said, with a pleading voice. At this stage, I was crying too. In two minutes, we could both be drowned in our own tears.

"…"

"I want to help you, but you need to tell me why you did this!" I say. It didn't seem like she was going to reply.

"BECAUSE I JUST COULDN'T COPE, ALRIGHT? BECAUSE I WANTED TO END EVERYTHING BUT THAT WOULDN'T WORK, SO I HAD TO DO THIS TO COPE! BUT RIGHT NOW, I WISH I DID END EVERYTHING!" she shouts. I jolt in surprise.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," was all she was muttering between sobs now.

"Sh, we'll work our way through things, alright?" I said.

"NO, nothing's gonna work. Go on – leave me. I know you want to – what normal person would want to be with a crazed up person anyway?" she says.

"But I'm not normal. And I love you, no matter what you do," I whispered softly into her ear.

"I gotta go," she said, before shaking me off and heading to the bathroom. A split second later, the door locks – I now know what she's up to. It sinks into my brain and run to the door. Too late… I start banging on the door like there's no tomorrow. THANK GOODNESS THESE WALLS ARE SOUND-PROOF.

"PATRICIA! PATRICIA OPEN THE DOOR!" I scream, knocking and kicking the door. No use.

**_Patricia's POV_**

I was sobbing hysterically now. I took my blade out.

"How could you be so stupid? Why didn't you throw that away?" I mumbled to myself. With that, I place the blade on my elbow. I was planning to drag it down to my wrist. I've never felt the urge to cut this desperately.

**_Drag_**

**_Drip_**

**_Drip_**

**_Drip_**

**_Drag_**

**_Drip_**

**_Drip_**

**_Drip _**

My arm was stinging like hell. I was drifting in and out of consciousness. Then, boom.

**_Whee ooh whee ooh_**

That's all I could hear before I slipped out again.


	9. Chapter 9: Admitting

**_(A/N: Chapter by Rjvamp369. Hope you guys like it. Soz we haven't updated in a while. Plz review!)_**

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Patricia's P.O.V_**

I fluttered my eyelids open to see white walls surrounding me. I turned to look at myself. White casts were wrapped around my wrists... Then realization hit - I was in hospital. I must have cut too deep... Oh gosh... I spun my head to my right, only to see a sleeping Eddie with a rather stressed-out facial expression. I began to realize what had happened... oh my gosh… Eddie must have been really worried.

"Patricia?" I turned to see Eddie awake, staring at me.

"Yeah?" I didn't know what else to say. Then I felt Eddie's strong arms around me. He was giving me a hug. I felt myself smiling at his embrace and wrapped my arms around him as well.

"You scared me to death," he whispered releasing me from the hug.

"I'm really sorry… I guess… I just… um… lost it…" I mumbled. He nodded and then took my hands.

"Why do you do it?" He asked. I took a deep breath and sighed. He needs to know but... I'm not sure if I can get the words out.

"Look Eddie... last summer...I um..." I started crying. I felt him squeeze my hands tighter.

"Hey, shh ,it's ok... take your time," he whispered.

"I... I w-was r-r-raped…" I sniffed. Eddie's expression seemed shocked at first but then it grew softer as he hugged me once more. I cried into his chest as he stroked my hair.

"It's ok..." he said as he kissed my head.

"T-t-there's m-m-more…" I stuttered. Eddie pulled back to look at me.

"What?" he asked. I couldn't look at him so I stared at the white sheets below me.

"Mr Sweet got a letter from... uh, him and it said he's coming after me," I said. He bit his lip.

"My dad knows?" He asked.

"He was the one who saved me…" I replied. I couldn't tell if Eddie was angry or happy.

"Why didn't he tell me?" Eddie murmured, mostly to himself.

"Because I asked him not to – Eddie, don't be mad at him. He was just doing what I asked him to," I said, now raising my head to look at Eddie who nodded.

"Yeah... Yeah I know. Have you been to the police?" He asked. I shook my head.

"When it happened, we did, and they said they'd do their best to find them but we haven't been to them about the letter," I stated. Eddie leaned in and kissed me. It was our first proper meaningful kiss in a while and it felt good. Then, he cupped my face.

"There's no way in hell I'm letting anyone hurt you again. I'm not letting you out of my sight," he whispered. I nodded.

**_If only if that would work…_**


	10. Chapter 10: No-One's On My Side

Disclaimer: We do NOT own HoA

**_Previously on The Pleasure of Pain:- _**

"There's no way in hell I'm letting anyone hurt you again. I'm not letting you out of my sight," he whispered. I nodded.

.

**_New Chapter_**

**_Patricia's POV_**

"You all have one hour fifteen minutes to complete the paper," our Accounting teacher, Mrs. Marith, my favorite teacher said. I groan. Oh yea – I was back at school, and the casts were finally off, but you could still see the fresh scars. At school, no-one seem to have heard of the accident – not even the Anubis residents. She walked up and down the aisles, at top speed. She briefly stops by me, but I just shrug it off.

Don't get me wrong – I LOVE this subject, but hell, I was NOT in the mood for it, after spending the last week in hospital.

**_Ding, ding!_**

Finally! After a LONG hour and fifteen minutes, the bell finally goes. She walks around again, to collect our papers.

"Alright. Everyone, dismissed, except, Miss Williamson, if you could stay behind," she said. Everyone stood up and left the classroom. Mrs. Marith closes the door behind the last person and sits back at her desk.

"Yes Ma'am?" I say. I was desperate to leave the classroom.

"I saw your arms, Patricia," she said, as a matter-of-fact. Wait, my arms? My scars? She couldn't have! I had my blazer on the entire time! I play innocent.

"My arms? … And it's supposed to mean…" I say, smiling my fake smile.

"What happened?" she asks quietly.

"Ma'am, I really have no idea what you're talking about… Are my arms the first pair of arms you've seen? Surely not, judging by the fact that everyone in the class has arms…" I say, fake-laughing.

"Oh save it, Patricia. You know what I'm talking about – the cuts? Where are they from?" she says, in a worried voice. **_Think fast_**, I say to myself.

"Oh, those!" I say cheerfully as an idea popped into my head. "I was skating over the holidays, and I drove my arm into another skater's blades…" I said, praying that she bought it. However, she shot me a triumphant look.

"My dearest Patricia," she starts. "We're just back from SUMMER holidays," she says. "And those cut are FRESH," she adds.

"Well how do you know I didn't go to…Antarctica?" I shoot her a sweet, yet deadly look.

"Should I give your mother a call?" she asks.

"No!" I say.

"Exactly. Give me your arms. Sleeve up," she says. I groan, but obey.

"Oh My Gosh," she whispers. "How?"

"I scraped myself on my locker," I say, rolling my eyes. She looks tired.

"Very well," she says. "You may go," she finishes, sighing and letting my arm go. To be honest, I'm surprised she let me go so easily…

"Hey… What was that about?" asks Eddie, who seems to have been waiting outside this entire time.

"Oh… uh… She just wanted to warn me that my grades in Accounting were dropping tremendously," I lie. Yes, lie – I don't want him to worry. No. Not after what JUST happened, with me in the hospital and everything. He smiles, puts an arm around me, and we head off to lunch.

.

**_That evening at Anubis House, after dinner_**

He warned me. The doctor warned me that one more cut on myself would earn him the right to throw me in rehab. Okay, okay – he didn't say it like that, but that's how my brain took it in. I'm currently sitting on the bathroom floor, blade in hand. The door was, of course, locked. I just don't know what to do. Just at that moment, a flow of urge rushes through me, and without realizing it, I cut myself. I moan. I had missed this – the pleasure of pain. It would allow me to let go of all things and just be me again. Well not quite, but you know what I mean… A knock on the door.

"Yacker?"

Shit, it's Eddie.

"What?" I snap.

"What are you doing in there?" he asks with a suspicious tone.

"Taking a shower, Eddie," I sigh.

"Um… okay… make it quick, please," he says.

"Don't tell me what to do, Slimeball," I say with my famous smirk-tone.

"Yea, yea," says Eddie. I hear him leave. I let out a LONG sigh of relief. I quickly make another couple of minor cuts and clean up. I put my wrist-watch on, and head out after putting the blade back in its hiding place. I put my watch on so it'd cover my scars. I go downstairs, talk to a couple of people including Eddie, before heading to bed. My, my, I'm tired…

.

**_The next day_**

**_Patricia's POV_**

"Alright, all of you may be dismissed. Patricia, I'd like to have a word with you," Mrs. Marith says. Damn, I should've known…

"Right, Patricia," she starts once she closed the door after the last person. "I called your mum," she says. I groan.

"What did she say?" I ask carefully.

"Why did you lie to me?" she says. She looks… somewhat… hurt?

"Who says I lied?" I defend myself. She walks up to me and pulls up my sleeve. I wince at the friction against my fresh, new cuts.

"Because, Patricia. You have more than yesterday. What, did you go to Antarctica and back again last night?" she says in a stern voice.

"I… I'm gonna be late for class," I say, and get up.

"No. You're not going anywhere. I've told Eddie I need your help for something and I've texted your next teacher that you'll miss out," she says firmly. I sigh and sit back down.

"So? What are these? C'mon, Patricia, you and I both know what they are. Please, just admit to them," she says in a pleading voice. Now, I'm pissed off.

"Fine, you want me to say it, I will. I cut myself. I'm crazy. I'm worthless, I'm a self-harmer. You happy now?" I said in a sharp voice. Surprisingly, she doesn't have tears in her eyes.

"Why do you?" she asks, still in her normal voice.

"I really don't want to talk about it. Besides, I had to tell my boyfriend that already. Isn't that enough?" I plead.

"Do your parents know?"

"No."

"Should I tell them?"

"NO!"

"Why not?"

"Because it's MY life, not theirs," I say, staring at the floor.

"Patri-… Nevermind… Go off to class… Can I talk to you tomorrow?"

"No. Bye," I say, before storming out. I know she only wanted to help me, but no. I don't want help.

.

**_Anubis House _**

"Patricia?" Eddie's voice sounds.

"In here!" I say. I was in my room, doing some homework. He comes in and sits next to me.

"She told me what happened. Mrs. Marith. She seemed pretty upset…" he said. I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever… I don't care…" I say. Silence fills the room for a minute, which seems like eternity.

Then, "Babe?" he started, with that voice of his, which clearly meant 'I'm so sorry, don't kill me'. I groan.

"Don't call me that. And yea?" I say, in a whisper.

"I-uh… I… Um…" he starts.

"No stuttering… You what?" I say, looking into his deep blue eyes.

"Please don't hate me for this, but I…" he finished, but I didn't hear what he said, regarding the fact that it was barely audible.

"Sorry?" I sniffed.

"I… I checked you into rehab," he said, looking away. I laughed.

"Eddie, stop messing around. What did you say at first?" I ask, still smiling. His expression remains rigid. Oh shit. This isn't a joke.

"It's not a joke, is it?" I said quietly.

"Nope…" he looks and sounds so guilty, but at that moment, I don't care. I'm filled with anger.

"Get out," I say quietly.

"What?" he says.

"Get out," I repeat in the same tone.

"Patricia, please. Don't do this-"

"GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS ROOM!" I burst. He knows when I need my space. He obediently gets up and leaves, hesitating at the door.

**_When he leaves, I burst into tears. I cry non-stop for 2 hours. What. A. Life._**

**_(A/N: Hello guys! Chappy by He0524… Love your reviews, keep 'em comin'! I don't mean any insults to people out there who SH… I understand how you guys feel! Thx!)_**

**_Next Chapter: Rehab. Patricia won't open up to the counselor. Eddie's shocked to hear some things in the next chapters!_**

**_Next Update: When we can (;_**


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